HOW TO HANDLE THAT INTERVIEW OVER LUNCH

By Karen Conole

A new trend seems to be developing among hiring managers: Interviewing job candidates over a meal.

You might be asked to a lunch interview because it may be that the manager’s office time is too committed with other tasks and meal times are the only option for long discussions, or that she wants to determine your social skills before bringing you on board, or that she wants to be sure you have the poise necessary to interact in a non-office setting should, for example, you be sent to work on an out-of-town trial team, but whatever the reason you’ll need to be prepared for this special circumstance.

Many hiring managers believe that you can tell a lot about a person by the way (s)he eats, so follow these guidelines for a successful interview over breakfast, lunch, or dinner:

Always follow the lead of your host

If your interviewer orders an appetizer, then it’s okay to order an appetizer. Same goes for dessert. Be sure your selection is comparably priced (or lower) to that of your host, although you’re not obliged to choose the least expensive thing on the menu. If your host suggests a particular dish, and it’s something you’re not averse to eating, take the suggestion and order it. You don’t want to be too much of a maverick right off the bat, and you may find that you enjoy it, too.

Keep in mind that experienced hiring managers are aware that they are looked to for guidance and should give you clues as to how and what to order. This is an opportunity for you to observe what may be your future boss and to determine how much support you’re getting (and how that will translate to support within the office setting).

Brush up on Your Table Manners.

Know the basics, such as how to butter bread, when and how to use your napkin, etc. Stop by the library or go online and briefly research dining etiquette. Even if you don’t get the job you should have this skill as an adult functioning in the world and there’s no time like the present to learn.

Don’t order hard liquor.

Keep the gin and tonics for evenings at home—even if your interviewer orders a mixed drink (which may be a test of your judgment). It’s probably best to forego beer and wine, too, but if you do decide to have a glass try to confine yourself to one round and nurse it, along with your water, throughout the meal. You don’t want to get too relaxed. Remember: This is an interview first and a meal second and you don’t want anything to impair your ability to think fast and intelligently answer questions throughout the meal—especially near the end.

If your host drinks too much, do not try to take her car keys. That is not your responsibility but it may be that of the restaurant, so discreetly suggest to a restaurant employee or a manager that a cab is needed. This, of course, would be another opportunity for you to size up your potential employer.

Skip messy or complicated menu items.

You don’t want the food to be the focus, so pick items that are easy to eat, avoiding anything that splashes, squirts, drips, forms gooey strings or rolls around on your plate. Don’t select anything that requires you to use your fingers unless you’re at a barbeque. But don’t eat in a manner that makes you appear overly fastidious: If you are at a barbeque, for example, it’s okay to eat with your hands—anything else will seem “prissy.”

Don’t draw attention to any dietary restrictions you may have

If you’re a vegetarian, order a salad and refrain from commenting on your host’s steak. If you’re on a low-fat diet and there’s nothing dietetic on the menu, do the best you can, perhaps by eating half your order, requesting the sauce on the side or resigning yourself to eating less that evening.

If you’re allergic to certain foods, don’t announce all the things you can’t eat—you’ll run the risk of being perceived as a finicky bore. Again, make the most educated guess of what you can eat then discreetly ask the server if that dish contains whatever ingredient concerns you. Don’t ask the server to make menu suggestions for you—you don’t want to appear indecisive and not in control of your own choices.

If you know where you’ll be eating ahead of time, call or stop by in advance and work out your menu choices before arriving for the interview, if possible.

The main thing to remember is that no one really cares what you’re allergic to (do you care about others’ dietary restrictions?) and some people won’t even believe it’s truly an allergy—rather than a personal dislike—of that food, so keep to a minimum any discussions of what you won’t eat or you’ll risk starting your interview on a down-note.

What about Smoking?

As with food allergies, now is not the time to bring up your personal opinions on smoking. Since most California establishments are non-smoking, this issue should not pose a problem if you’re a nonsmoker. However, if you are in an establishment that tacitly allows it and your interviewer does light up, you’ll need to endure it as best you can.

The only exception would be if you’re allergic to cigarette smoke and will cough/sneeze uncontrollably if exposed to it. Then you will need to request a location where the smoke won’t be so bothersome—perhaps in a better ventilated area. If that’s not possible, and you begin to feel the ill effects, you can excuse yourself for a restroom break to recover and hope that your interviewer will take the hint. If he doesn’t or if he isn’t sympathetic to your situation, you should consider whether this is the type of person who will be sympathetic to other legitimate requests you might have, once you’re on the job. This interview process works both ways, so be sure to take note of these clues.

If you’re a smoker and just have to smoke after a meal, you, too, may just have to grin and bear it, knowing it’s not for long and that you will soon be free to smoke alone and in peace.

Only if your interviewer lights up first is it ever permissible to smoke, and then only after you’ve asked if that person will mind.

Who reaches for the check?

Not you. The firm you’re applying with will pay for both your meals, so don’t offer to pay your share when the check comes. If you haven’t already done so earlier, you can excuse yourself for a restroom break at that moment, giving your interviewer a chance to calculate the tip in private, but it’s not necessary, as most hiring professionals can do this quickly and unobtrusively.

If, against all odds, you are asked to contribute, do so politely and then mentally cross this firm off your list of desirable places to work. (Do you really want to work for a firm that can’t or won’t spring for your lunch?) In any case, always bring money.

What do I talk about?

This is an interview first and foremost, so prepare for it as you would an office interview. Both of you are trying to determine if you and the firm will be a good fit, so prepare a list of questions that you want answered, as well as personal achievements and other qualifications you want to cover. Keep the mantra in your head: “It’s an interview, it’s an interview…” Usually there will be a measure of small talk at the beginning and/or end of the meal which is to be expected, but if conversation digresses too far for too long from the subject of your qualifications for the job, try to steer it back on topic with some comment such as, “While they’re fresh in my mind, I’d like to touch upon additional qualifications I have for this position, if I may…”

Be aware that all laws regarding workplace behavior apply to job-related interviews away from the office. Your interviewer may not ask questions of a discriminatory nature, including your race, creed, color, national origin, age, religion, sex, pregnancy, ancestry, citizenship, marital status, physical or mental disability, medical condition, sexual orientation, special disability or childcare issues. Most professionals know this and will not venture into these areas. However, if you are asked an inappropriate/illegal question, politely deflect it by saying something like, “I’m not comfortable discussing the specifics of my (race/creed/etc.), but I would be happy to discuss further my qualifications for the position. I’m confident I can meet and even exceed your firm’s requirements.”

Lastly, as with any interview, take a moment that day to send a brief thank you note for your lunch and the interviewer’s time. It’s not only smart, it’s common courtesy.

Then, since you’ve given it your best shot, all that’s left to do is relax and wait for your call back!